The sky was dark. Rain was falling hard on the ground. And if someone was present and watching, they would’ve seen a girl of 14 standing in the rain and searching.
Every other morning there was not much you would’ve seen even if you would’ve observed me carefully. I am a simple, boring nerd, who is clearly not fun to be around. Every morning i do the same thing, follow the same routine, think about the same thing and be the same girl. But not today. No, i wasn’t studying today in the morning, i wasn’t hunched over my science books or solving mathematics, i wasn’t thinking about my career and i was clearly not the same girl.
No. I was just sitting on the terrace and thinking. I was grief stricken. I was lonely. I was annoyed. I was angry. I was scared. There had been a rush through a life. My mate. My friend. My enemy. My lover. My hater. My love. My heart. My summer. My winter. Had left. A petal from the flower of my life had fallen. Should i be sad? I didn’t know. Should i be angry? I didn’t know. i didn’t know anymore who i was. Who i will be. Presumably not one but two petals had fallen off my flower. My eyes had been crying the whole night. But i wasn’t crying anymore. The tears were frozen and stuck to my face. It had been a clear day in the morning. Maybe i had been sitting there for 18 hours. As the evening descended, it brought wind and rain. And as i was sitting/crying/thinking, something happened. Something had happened to my friend. I wanted to know what. So just like that i ran downstairs and out of the building and towards the field. Barefoot i ran, the wind racing against me and the rain falling on me. Anf as i reached the right place, i started searching. Searching for my faults. Searching for errors. Searching for memories.